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I Missed My Lecture

I knew you now, I saw you for the first time that day and I found you to be an ordinary normal guy.

Later that day, when I was walking towards cafeteria, accompanying my friend, she started talking about you again, how you are so beautiful, so popular. How you have this perfect smile and how you dress so decently. I was smiling, nodding time to time, listening to her.

The time had passed and now I was at home, and all I could do was to think about what she said about you, not you exactly, but what she said you are. I smiled, wondering how someone can fall for anyone like that!?

Following day, we were in class, jotting down the lecture, when you entered the class.

He is always a late comer!

Said she, pointing you. You were still wearing that same Black t.shirt today. You were looking fresh, and good. You sat on the corner right chair of the last row, waving and smiling towards your friend. I was still looking at you, unknowingly, involuntarily. I kept looking at you and minutes passed, she was still talking about you but I wasn't paying attention. All I heard then was murmuring people and confusing noise.

Oh you stop it now! 

Noticing I am not paying attention, she looked at me for a while and said. I gave her this nervous glance, I was so engrossed in watching you I didn't understand what is she saying.

Stop what?!

I asked nervously.

Stop staring him!?

She replied sarcastically.

Embarrassed of getting caught staring at you, I tried to look normal and replied in a voice hardly above the whisper,

LOL, I'm not staring.

She looked at me shaking her head like she is telling me, see didn't I already warn you about his charm, and then she started penning down her lecture. I was still confused, playing with my pen, I was staring blankly at the board. And I don't want to sound poetic but at that moment, all I saw was flying words, intermixing into each other. All I heard was gusty sound of chaos. I tried to pay attention but it was not working, I still was not thinking about you, or maybe this time I was not thinking at all. I was blank. 

Class has been finished, our teacher started calling the roll and now he was shouting out my roll number; aloud and clear, I didn't hear. My friend shook my shoulder and I anxiously marked my attendance.

Where is your attention, why are you being so absent minded?! Are you sleepy?

My friend asked worriedly. I looked at her, smirked then laughed out loud, I still don't know why I did that, assured her I am fine. She was still looking surprised, she said,

You missed your lecture, you were not marking your attendance and now you're laughing. Of course, not everything is fine.

And I then realized, I had missed my lecture but it didn't matter that time. I looked at her, smiled again and changed the topic, knowing nothing is fine. Nothing will never be fine. I will never be fine again.

Today, in the same Black t.shirt you wore yesterday, you were not ordinary, and you were for sure not any other guy I saw everyday. Today, I missed my lecture and I nearly missed my attendance too, and all because of you. We don't miss lectures for ordinaries. There was something special about you, that I didn't realize then.




Or probably I did. 

I looked at you again this time, without her mentioning you. I looked at you willingly, smiled and looked away.

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