Skip to main content

I Missed My Lecture

I knew you now, I saw you for the first time that day and I found you to be an ordinary normal guy.

Later that day, when I was walking towards the cafeteria, accompanying my friend, she started talking about you again, how you are so beautiful, so popular. How you have this perfect smile and how you dress so decently. I was smiling, nodding time to time, listening to her.

The time had passed and now I was at home, and all I could do was to think about what she said about you, not you exactly, but what she said you are. I smiled, wondering how someone can fall for anyone like that!?

Following day, we were in class, jotting down the lecture, when you entered the class.

He is always a late comer!

Said she, pointing you. You were still wearing that same Black t.shirt today. You were looking fresh, and good. You sat on the corner right chair of the last row, waving and smiling towards your friend. I was still looking at you, unknowingly, involuntarily. I kept looking at you and minutes passed, she was still talking about you but I wasn't paying attention. All I heard then was murmuring people and confusing noise.

Oh, you stop it now! 

Noticing I am not paying attention, she looked at me for a while and said. I gave her this nervous glance, I was so engrossed in watching you I didn't understand what is she saying.

Stop what?!

I asked nervously.

Stop staring him!?

She replied sarcastically.

Embarrassed of getting caught staring at you, I tried to look normal and replied in a voice hardly above the whisper,

LOL, I'm not staring.

She looked at me shaking her head like she is telling me, see didn't I already warn you about his charm, and then she started penning down her lecture. I was still confused, playing with my pen, I was staring blankly at the board. And I don't want to sound poetic but at that moment, all I saw was flying words, intermixing into each other. All I heard was the gusty sound of chaos. I tried to pay attention but it was not working, I still was not thinking about you, or maybe this time I was not thinking at all. I was blank. 

The class has been finished, our teacher started calling the roll and now he was shouting out my roll number; loud and clear, I didn't hear. My friend shook my shoulder and I anxiously marked my attendance.

Where is your attention, why are you being so absent minded?! Are you sleepy?

My friend asked worriedly. I looked at her, smirked then laughed out loud, I still don't know why I did that, assured her I am fine. She was still looking surprised, she said,

You missed your lecture, you were not marking your attendance and now you're laughing. Of course, not everything is fine.

And I then realized, I had missed my lecture but it didn't matter that time. I looked at her, smiled again and changed the topic, knowing nothing is fine. Nothing will ever be fine. I will never be fine again.

Today, in the same Black t.shirt you wore yesterday, you were not ordinary, and you were for sure not any other guy I saw every day. Today, I missed my lecture and I nearly missed my attendance too, and all because of you. We don't miss lectures for ordinaries. There was something special about you, that I didn't realize then.




Or probably I did. 

I looked at you again this time, without her mentioning you. I looked at you willingly, smiled and looked away.

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

She misses her father.

Dad, you taught me to play. You taught me to play with all those little dolls, Stuffed animals, electronic trains, toy robots, You taught me to hold the bat, and hit the ball, You taught me how to handle the rackets, And how to play badminton or table tennis, You made me able to play and won all those different games. When I was the littlest of me, a toddler, You taught me to sit, to stand, to crawl, to walk, and to run You saw me learning to speak, laugh, smile, You witness me getting older and older with every passing day, And you were my mentor for all of this. My first day of school, then college, university, And finally, my first day on the job. You were proud, you were the happiest, And my biggest inspiration, my teacher, my best advisor, You saw me achieving it bit by bit and you were there. You were there to pick me up every time I fall, And support me, and encourage me every time I fail, You taught me how to handle tears when I am down, And how to laugh

You are her escape.

Every time she is a little too sad inside, she comes to you. She comes to you running, walking, crawling, the least she has the strength the fastest she comes to you. Every time, when someone very dear to her betrayed her, cheated on her, or left her in the worldly chaos to fight alone, and to wonder if she is strong enough to get over the hurt that beloved has caused her, she gathers her courage, and recollect all the torn pieces of her heart, hopes, and trust, and she comes to you. And that time, when someone who was the dearest to her, died, she didn't say a word, she laughed hysterically, she grieved in silence and came to you. She prayed for his peace in the hereafter and stayed patient. When everyone around her was crying, screaming, complaining about the loss she had gone through, she remained calm, she asked everyone to be strong, and she quietly whispered to you to make it easy for all of them, and that she believes that whatever you did must be the right thing to do, s

How to be happy?

Once was very happy. The same girl cries a lot now. Who did this to her? They say, she killed her happiness. Why would she? She is crazy. What drove her crazy? She did this to herself. Weird, she seems stupid. Yes, she does. But why? Who knows. Once she was known as the happiest-go-luckiest girl. Her teacher was tired of her always laughing. Annoyingly he'd say, you don't care where you sit, you will always laugh, right? Happily, she'd say, yes, sir! I am always happy. I make my own happiness. How? they'd ask. Just like this! She'd shrug. It was easy for her to be happy. Her classmates called her "Kittenish". Who laughs the most, cries the most too, they'd tell her. Nah, I won't. Proudly she'd say. Believing in her fate, in her God, in herself. I'll always laugh like this. Then she fell in love. With this calm, great guy, I must say. He was so beautiful. She used to think about him all the time. He had this infectious smile and chameleon ey